I have been looking at this write-along for a few days now wondering if I could give any advice. Sure we all do things everyday that keep us sane and moving forward, but what do I do that helps me? Well, after contemplating this for a while now, I guess the one piece of advice I would like to share has to do with relationship health.
While I am by no means an expert on this subject, I consider my 22 year marriage to be a happy success. Just as with any other couple we have our days that are less than perfect, but all-in-all, I wouldn't change my husband for the world.
I got to thinking what we have done differently to other couples, that works for us, and here is what I would like to share.
Talk It Out.
When problems arise, just talk it out. My parents gave me this advice when I was first married. Don't let the sunset while you are angry they told me. This for me has proven to be very good advice. It has at times been challenging, but I have found the sooner you tackle your problems, the easier they are to resolve. Often we get angry over trivial things, or we are not really angry at each other at all, just frustrated with a particular situation. The faster you find out what and why, the faster you can get over it.
Remember When.
22 years is a long time to be married. Sometimes little things that my husband does just drives me crazy, some days more than others. What I do to overcome this is just sit back for a few minutes and remember. I remember when we were first dating, the things that attracted me to him. I think about the first time I saw him, how the room seemed to stand still, and how I felt when we started talking. I think back to our first date, the day he said "I love you". I remember different things each time and this reminds me of how much I love him. It is important to remember why you fell in love in the first place and build on that, everyday. Maintaining a happy and loving relationship is not easy, but it is possible. Thinking about all these happy memories you have shared make all those unhappy times less important.
It's easy to harp on little things, but why do that when there are such good, positive things you can focus on. This will make you happier and healthier since you will be getting rid off all that negative energy. Appreciate and love your mate everyday, and even though we may know we love each other, never underestimate the power of a heartfelt "I Love You".