It's been long since i have posted on steemit.
The starting of July has just been nothing but an emotional roller coaster month.
My grandmother was recently diagnosed with Sepsis. Sepsis is basically a potentially life threatening complication which is an infection. It occurs when chemicals are somehow released into the bloodstream. With that being said , inflammation can be triggered and cause multiple changes that can possibly damage multiple to multiple organs in the body hence causing them to fail.
Not to mention my grandma is 89 years of age. Bed ridden in the nursing home for 7 years.
On Sunday night at around 10:00 pm , i got a called from my Aunty saying that grandma is diagnosed with septic shock that's when her blood pressure totally drop and she was going to die. The doctor called and told us to rush to the nursing home at 10:30 pm at night to see her just in case she passed on.
At that point of time , i haven't had my dinner ( waiting for my food ) while watching Spain playing at the pub called Spitalfield's Gastrobar at Atria Shopping Gallery. I was just so afraid and scared at the same time my hand was shaking.
So i takeaway the food and told myself to just calm down. As i was in the car on the way to see my grandma , i was reminded of this verse taken from the book of Isaiah.
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. " Isaiah 41:10
The moment i step into the nursing home and saw my grandmother , i couldn't help but to keep speaking in tongues & pray. We as a family made a decision to no send her to the hospital as my grandma wanted to passed on in the nursing home instead of every single tube / injection is in her body. She would rather go than to suffer. I was alright with her decision and fully respected it. Her funeral clothings , shoes , picture etc etc were brought to the nursing home just incase she couldn’t make it.
Sometimes in life throws a curve ball at us and the wind tend to knock us off and we start to have that thinking I want to trust you , but i do not know how. I don't know how to carry / continue on. To be honest, its never easy to trust God in moments like this but the Lord takes us through waves upon waves in our life but the lord always guide us in every step.
It was during this point in my life where i just sang
" My comfort, my shelter
Tower of refuge and strength
Let every breath, all that I am
Never cease to worship You "
Before i left the nursing home , i took this photo as i thought that it might be the very last time i would hold my grandma hand and i gave her a kiss on her forehead. i couldn't sleep the whole night at all. I was just extremely exhausted being emotionally drain. But i told God, You are in control. If it's time for grandma to go , then i am ready and able to accept as she do not need to suffer anymore.
The next day i woke up my Aunty send me this photo as she was at the nursing home
From what i saw with my own eyes, saliva dripping, face turn pale, legs cold , hands cold , couldn't speak, unconscious, no respond , skinny , face change and sweating , took a huge turn and that's what she looks like the very next day and it's was on a Monday morning. When i saw that picture i had to quickly rub my eyes multiple times because i thought i was dreaming.
I was rather confused and blur. Asking myself , what in the world is going on.
Fast forward a few days - Today she is alive and kicking without the oxygen tank needed. She can eat, talk like a normal human being , scold people and being all fussy like how she normally is.
I do not know whether the sudden change is temporary hence abnormal surge of well being before death or God just completely healed her from head to toe.
No matter what it is, i am trusting God in this journey and spending as much time as i can with grandma.
One thing i learn is trust the process God will bring you through it.