This my membership application for @thealliance.
How did you find #thealliance?
How I found @thealliance is quite the story. It all started during an expedition. Recently, my memory has been escaping into the void, but I'll attempt to recall what had occurred.
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A breeze brushed against my bronze skin. It was a brief yet welcoming solace from the smouldering torment of the afternoon heatwave. The bandana that was once drenched with water was now completely dried. The taste of salt on my lips distracted my mind away from the quest that I haphazardly accepted. I needed water but there was none in sight. This was the same rumination I had couple minutes before as I roamed the desolate Sahara wasteland.
The horizon in every direction was identical -- infinite waves of sandy terrain. Had I not listened to the Uisin the Elder Monk, I might've been in a less desperate scenario. My sanity slowly shifted to the acceptance of my anticipated outcome -- death, alone in the middle of nowhere. There was nobody accountable for my unfortunate circumstance but myself. I sluggishly walked couple steps, collapsed, then passed out.
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As I was gaining consciousness, I heard the sound of a river in the distance. I slowly opened my eyes and much to my surprise, I was surrounded by a vivacious ecosystem somewhere within a flourishing forest. Still exhausted from dehydration and starvation, I struggled to get on my feet. I eventually began walking towards the sound of the current. I drew strength from knowing that water was nearby. I was very close.
Then, at the moment I had a glimpse of the river, I immediately tripped and fell flat on my face. I lost consciousness yet again.
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When I awakened, I found myself in a new yet familiar surrounding. I had been here before. It was my bedroom. I got out of bed, turned on my laptop, and noticed @simgirl and @snook interviewing @enginewitty for their show, "Sim Your Life" on MSP Waves Radio (every Tuesday from 4 to 6 pm UTC). Although I missed the majority of the show, during the last 20 minutes, I was introduced to The Alliance. And that's how I found #thealliance.
Why do you want to be here?
In order for me explain the "why", I must explain the "how".
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On September 22, 553, a mute newborn was discarded at the entrance of the Beopju Buddhist temple in what is currently known as Boeun County, South Korea. Silla monk, Uisin, the founder of the Beopju temple, spotted the baby boy early that morning. He adopted the infant.
The boy was raised under the principles and philosophies of the Maitreya Buddha. The day the boy memorized the sacred sutra traditions of the canonical texts, Uisin instructed him to travel northwest to obtain the esoteric tradition of tantra. The boy obeyed and set out to achieve his objective.
What Uisin failed to inform the boy was that the journey would take decades to accomplish.
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The boy quickly became a man as he traveled and encountered innumerable variety of cultures and circumstances. And even escaping death in multiple situations. From this point, the outcome of the legend is not clarified. Some speculate that he successfully completed the mission, but never returned back to the temple. Others speculate that he died from falling flat on his face.
His name?
Scuzzy I.
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Now, you might be wondering: How does this potentially inaccurate historical event relate to why Scuzzy wants to be a member of #thealliance family?
Well, in order understand the "what" to the "how" and the "why" to the "what", I must explain how why "how" is why how "why" is. Why? It's just how it is.
In other words, I saw @enginewitty's unofficial entry to @simgirl and @snook's Bad Karaoke Contest. And if the founder of #thealliance has family jewels the size of Pluto, then that's a community I want get behind and support.
What qualities do you have that would make you a valued member of the family?
I have approximately one thousand undisclosed superlative skills and abilities that could be utilized and applied for the Alliance. However, if those unparalleled proficiency fall into the hands of our adversaries, then what was once naturally pure will turn nefarious and detrimental to the community.
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Although the depiction of these hyper-physical artistry only exist in the grey matter within Scuzzy's divine skull, I am willing to jeopardize our existence so that #thealliance may be enlightened.
Here are three qualities that will deliver innumerable entities from exploitation and corruption:
- I'm the undefeated stone skipping champion in my mind; i.e., I'm disciplined, motivated, and determined.
- I'm a self-proclaimed cat whisperer with a million percent success rate; i.e., I'm patient, empathetic, and perceptive.
- I hold the world-record for most blinks per second (currently 42 blinds/sec); i.e., I'm resourceful, creative, and optimistic.