She isn't scheduled to work tonight.
Sometimes I think that over time probably it grew to become instinct / habit for me to think that I feel always looking forward to and good about whatever time I have the opportunity to spend with her.
When those moments present rhemselves,
It's like I automatically think I feel glad.
But when relations go awry for whatever reason, those moments together don't turn out feeling so great.
And I have in mind, too, that I recently finally accepted that its for the best that I detach and move out, head our separate ways. This is supposed to be happening in a couple months.
So I probably should do myself the favor of starting to instill a new mindset that prepares me for this drastic change of events.
I need to seriously work on changing those habits, those ways of thinking and doing things with regards to Des.
The time seems to be going by fast. That moment will soon arrive.
Some part of me doesn't want to think about it.
But I have to make myself think about it. I want to be prepared. I long to discover peace of mind and closure about moving on.