Wow, number 3. I never thought I would reach this far. Commitment issues and all. The same can be said about me being on any one of these crypto platforms. It will end though. I just can't say when.
That is the nature of how I see many things, it will fizzle out and die. Not a bad thing and not a good thing I suppose. That is the way of the world, people come and people go. Ideas are born then suffocated with a pillow because maintaining it will cost too much or maybe you are just bored.
Maybe you enjoy the attention you get and need to see a doc because the kind of munchies you have is not healthy by any means.
I like to think that if I ever had to see a psychiatrist that eventually the state will investigate whether I am allowed to seek professional help as all of my previous help would have snuffed themselves. Ah the dreams of a child, am I right?
To be exact those were dreams of a 12 year old, I now know better and acknowledge that a lot more work would have to go into something like that. Funny how I always considered psychological destruction on strangers yet more poisonous and pain inflicting means for those I knew. Obviously with a way to not truly get my hands dirty. Don't mind me I am just reminiscing.
Lately I have been on a bit of a precipice of things, not too sure what those things entail but they do seem to have a lot to do with drowning out the noise. Noise from work, online and the asshole downstairs who can't close a door without slamming it.
Some fucktard is also puking every morning in their bathroom and I can't see why they gotta be so loud. Maybe an illness which is still not my concern, the volume is my concern. Anyway if they are doing it as a cleanse of sorts then I wonder how much thought went into all that acid coming out their throats.
It is no mystery that I find people to be trash and yet I also tolerate a lot. Sure they do me the same courtesy and tolerate me, I do wonder though if our reason for tolerating others are different.
Mine is because just as I do not care enough for their opinion to be bothered with countering I also do not care enough with their existence to be bothered with improving it.
This will include not correcting them, allowing them to say whatever they want, to want whatever they fancy and feigning interest when they are doing their whole feeling thing.
You should only feign at the cliche moments though, do not engage further. Make it wholly visible that it is what you are doing and the fucker will harden up in most cases.
Since they mostly do not ask about why you are pretending they should have an instinctual defence and try to show strength by moving on to another topic or whatever the reason is you got caught into a shitshow feeling trap.
I think that is it for Untitled 3, back to my precipice. Maybe I will jump let's hope it is one of those built it up in your head kinds and turns out to only be a little step.