Ensured Updates - regardless of battery power, pressing homework assignments, or half-over presentations
The Feedback Hub - a super friendly interface to report bugs and glitches, even if no one reads them
Endless Settings - each setting appears on at least three different menus, so no matter where you look, you'll find what you need after a couple of hours
Bi-Annual Major Releases - a completely new version requires hours to install appears every six months, as opposed to Ubuntu only forcing major upgrades every four years
Antimalware - autodeletes any suspicious file, even if you made it
Whole Disk Encryption - most people don't need that right? What are you trying to hide?
Spam Filled Store - for when you get bored reading emails
Support for Linux Subsystem - so developers can still use Windows
Auto Diagnostics - get a weird error opening that spreadsheet? No worries! Win10 auto-detects troublesome files and uploads them to Microsoft for analysis
Backup Personal Information - Microsoft tracks all of your activity for you and stores it on their server along with any personal information they can grab, resulting in more invasive diagnostics and more relevant ads, as opposed to the blatant lack of advertising found on Ubuntu along with less-efficient voluntary error reporting (Thanks @mytechtrail !)
Did we forget anything? Leave a comment!