I love to write, I really do, but I have become very disheartened by it of late. I am desperate for it to become my career so I can give my children everything they need and want and have money to spare. I also want people and children around the world to go to sleep with a smile on their faces thank to my books. I want to share it with the world!!!
Now to why I'm disheartened, it is the lack of publishing options that is getting me down. I have a publisher in Australia wanting two books but it is a pay for publishing , they do everything from the illustration's to the marketing and selling which would be great for me. It is not a scam company like Olympia or Austin McCauley, but I did not do my research properly from the start to know they advertise themselves as a self publishing company, whereas the two mentioned above do not.
They have been in contact and really want my books and I want to publish them . It will give me and my children a good future, with a much needed step on the ladder to traditional book contracts, or so i hope.
Anyway i did the kindle self publishing thing with four of my children's books out of desperation to raise the money for publication that way, but needless to say all I got was a big fat nothing even after putting them in kindle unlimited. A total of forty free book lends while more than I honestly expected, I hoped they would lead to some sales also. I have now removed them as after months kindle is proving useless as I need a proper publishing format with illustration's to get sales, but I can't afford that so it's a catch twenty one.
I have started to become very disheartened like I said, why are there no publishers willing to give people a chance and why aren't self publishing companies cheaper to help people get started? Because honestly I'm going to have to not not go ahead with the publishing because of the cost which is why Im feeling down. Even better would be a company willing to do it for free but with more money from the sales going to them as a result. That would help people like me no end, I wouldn't mind taking only 30% or so if it meant my work would be seen .
I have also asked family who can afford it for help but the only response I got was " you'll have to wait until til you can afford it" but I will never have that money free to just go ahead and no I'm not asking for money on here. I am just venting my frustration as a form of self therapy.
As the title of the post says, is there a point or should i just give up now and accept it will never happen? It really makes it hard to write these days with the way I feel and I've almost given up even writing for my enjoyment. Sorry for the moan but I'm just fed up of late and the hopeless situation.
Maybe it is best that I at least take a long break to try and buck up my spirits some.