danielshortell

Synopsis: Among the lush verdancy of sublime American suburbia, wars are brewing. A creeping sense of malaise is causing upright citizens to act in downright sinister ways. Competitive lawn-care and

In what can only be hailed as a remarkable achievement, Israeli Crime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu delivered damning evidence against the Middle East’s most dangerous rogue nation. Bibi outlined irrefutable

Preface: Evolution is inevitable, its outcomes deterministic based on myriad social, physical and environmental factors contributing to change. For thousands of years, homo sapiens have ruled the animal

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Preface: Socially-awkward people go through intense struggles and play never-ending mind games with themselves. Although the DSM hasn't successfully diagnosed their affliction as yet (Avoidant Personality

Hello everyone. I recently moved to a new town. People here seem to view the world differently than I do. The adjustment process has been quite difficult for me. As a catharsis, I wrote this humble poem

Dear Abby, It pains me to write to your advice column, but I've reached my wit's end. I've pursued modern scientific channels (child psychologist, neurologist, endocrinologist), alternative channels (Reiki,

Hi All, Welcome to the Eighth week of The Comedy Open Mic Contest. Please read the contest rules here Credit to our Dandy (@dandesign86) for creating this logo for us Rules for Judges Contest will run

My only real complaint is that he doesn't look me in the eyes when he's doing it. Well, the blanket too. It gets stuffy and hot under the wool blanket, diminishing the experience. That nauseating, wild

He walks into walls often, bouncing off them, usually bloodying his nose or banging a knee. It wasn't always this way, the blood-stained shirts, cracked toenails, bruised knees. He used to see other worlds,

Since today I'm celebrating my first 30 days on this platform, I decided to gather all the 30 thoughts that went through my mind while being here. It was more or less a cycle of paranoia, narcissism, and

Luck's a funny thing. Like a punch to the face. Jarring, disorienting. You "have a bit of luck" and in the moment, the world's askew. Perspectives are oblique, time and reality are a little warped.

Synopsis: A nice lady's inner dialog spirals out of control as she is born into her new reality. Through our binoculars we see Gladys from afar. Her head fills the entirety of the viewable space. Her

Anyone who has two brain cells to rub together knows Time Magazine is the clairvoyant purveyor of emerging music culture. Moronic conspiracy theorists claim Time is an antiquated rag shilling for corporate

Synopsis: A precocious 7-year-old boy drafts a letter to his frenemy the day before he moves out of state. Dear Jimmy, In 18 hours you will leave Vermont. Your family's U-haul is packed and padlocked,

Is this what happens to value in post-industrial, indulgence-oriented, developed economies? The following is an excerpt from th!s...(All images are original artwork by @serste) ...she burst through the

**Note: The following letter (6 pages) was discovered folded inside a bible bearing the name "Cardinal Mackey". The bible was sitting in the second pew, far left-hand side in St. Mary's Church

The sheer quantity of baldly superficial, uber materialistic rap targeting the teenage demographic is horrifying at best, dystopian at worst. In three-minute vignettes, we see the world reduced to a

Fawning as it may seem, I think the customers are the best part of my job. Now, I can hear your thoughts. Of course I need them to patronize my shop, but that's not the reason. Too many people in retail

A short fable, in a kid-friendly format, spotlighting the dirtbags who profit from illegitimate take-downs. FOREWORD FOR PARENTS Most kids' books I've read suck. Invariably, when reading them to my son,