When we think about personal growth, we tend to focus on things like career success, education, or physical fitness. But what about growth in our inner selves? Learning to love and accept ourselves for who we are?
The path of self-love is not a straight path, sometimes smooth, sometimes disturbed. My own journey has had its own fair share of twist and turns.
But one thing I've come to learn, is how important it is to silence the negative voices in my head.
In the past, I struggled with self-doubt and negative self-talk. And those held me down, being an overthinker. While the negative comments from others were hurtful, the most damaging thing was when I agreed with them, and accepted those doubts as truths. I was drowning in my own insecurities.
During my university admission processing, I heard from all directions, different reasons why I wouldn't be accepted into the university of my choice. Those words seeped into my mind, until I fully believed them. And when the first batch of admission list was released, and I wasn't on it, I was heartbroken. In that moment I believed that I wasn't good enough and that everyone, including the voice in my head was right.
Also, growing up, my father's approval was something I could never quite grasps, no matter what it was I did, or how hard I studied and performed on exams.
As I progressed through from primary school to university, he always has something to say against my results.
Even in my one of my proudest moment, when I had gotten above four points out of five points in the university, that had my friends dancing in joy for me. A simple "can't you do better?" from my dad was all it took to erase my happiness and instill self-doubts in their place.
In those moments and also others, I questioned my abilities, and believed that I wasn't good enough.
I can't pinpoint a particular event that changed my perspection of self-love, but I noticed how critical my inner dialogue could be, constantly berating myself for even the smallest mistake. I decided to start reframing my thoughts, instead focusing on what I did well and forgiving myself for being human.
These are what I found out:
❣️ Positive self-talk is important for maintaining healthy self-esteem and overall well-being. It can make you feel better about yourself, and it can help you do better at things.
❣️ When you think good things about yourself, it can help you feel happier and more confident. And that can help you do better at your job, at school, or in your relationship.
❣️ Positive self-talk can be like a shield against negative thoughts. When you're nice to yourself, it's easier to deal with tough times and to feel good about yourself
In conclusion, It's quite easy to focus on what we perceive as our failures. We pay more attention to the times we don't do well, and ignore all the times we did well. And yes, life would throw obstacles our way, but they're not a reflection of our worth. Silence the inner critic, embrace self-compassion, and focus on growth, not perfection. Let's be happy with who we are. Be our own cheerleader.
Thanks for reading 😊
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