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A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him, 'Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, but they only know to say one thing.' 'What do they say?' the priest asked. They say, 'Hi, we're hookers!

Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was admired for sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into

An old guy walks into a bar and the bartender asks for ID. "You've got to be kidding," he said. "I'm almost 60 years old." The bartender apologized, but said he had to see the license.

Bert feared his wife Peg wasn't hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family Doctor to discuss the problem. The Doctor

There is a new study about women and how they feel about their asses, the results were pretty interesting. 30% of women think their ass is too fat, 10% of women think their ass is too skinny, the remaining

A woman from Los Angeles who was a tree hugger, a liberal Democrat, and an anti-hunter, purchased a piece of timberland near Colville , WA .. There was a large tree on one of the highest points in the

. Well over 50 yrs ago I knew a lady who would not buy Christmas gifts if they were made in China. Her daughter will recognize her in the following. Did y'all see Diane Sawyer's special report? They removed

What happened in the past that was painful has a great deal to do with who we are today.

'OLD' IS WHEN.... Your sweetie says, 'Let's go upstairs And make love,' and you answer, 'Pick one; I can't do both!' 'OLD' IS WHEN... Your friends compliment you On your new alligator shoes And you're

Scotch with two drops of water A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says, 'I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 80th

I'm passing this on because it worked for me today. A Doctor on TV said to have inner peace we should always finish things we start & we all could use more calm in our lives. I looked around my house

In the 1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have 'the rule of thumb' Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was

The Darwin’s are out!!!! Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us. Here is the glorious winner: When his 38 caliber revolver failed

Don't Laugh, and don't be bashful. ASK. Where is my Senior Discount. Surprise !!! Some GOOD news for a change!!! As I was waiting in line behind an older gentleman at Wendy's recently, I heard him ask

A first-grade teacher, Ms Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, 'Harry, what's your problem?' Harry answered, 'I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd

Please take time to read this and pay particular attention to"A Little Gun History" about half way down. Why Grandpa carries a gun, scroll way down, PEOPLE ASK WHY? Why Carry a Gun? My old grandpa

Two local men were injured when their pickup truck left the road and struck a tree near Cotton Patch on State Highway 38 early Monday. Woodruff County Deputy Dovey Snyder reported the accident shortly

A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching his wife, who was looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off he asked what she'd like to have for her birthday. 'I'd like to

Dear Friends & Family - I am sorry that I have not been consistently responsive lately to your emails. I have been somewhat under the weather since my doctors informed me that I have an acute case

A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him, 'Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, but they only know to say one thing.' 'What do they say?' the priest asked. They say, 'Hi, we're hookers!