Book Babble #15: "The Go-Giver" by Bob Burg & John D. Mann

"A Little Story About a Powerful Business Idea"

Go-givers, go-getters and… go-receivers??

You've seen the movies. Tom Cruise rocks up in the opening scenes… high-powered businessman shouting down his phone on the streets of New York. Trying to clinch the latest deal so he can climb the corporate ladder. Estranged from his wife and hardly sees his kid(s)… and work always comes first. By the end of the movie of course, he softens, gets back with the missus, re-ignites the relationship with his kid and realises 'money and success aren't everything, you know'.

Joe is that type of character in this book. Young, ambitious and wanting to hammer his way to the top… or at least make his sales targets this quarter. Joe is a reasonable guy, he just wants to get ahead and make himself a success. A true go-getter. Make things happen. Shake things up.

Could it be that Joe's approach is wrong? No, not wrong but perhaps a little misguided and ironically working against him?

The Go-Giver is a game-changer for many people. A fairly short read and told as a story rather than blurting out straight information. Story is always a good way to go as it bypasses parts of the brain that have heard it all before and don't want to be told what to do.

This is one of the reasons I like a bit of Paulo Coelho occasionally. You wouldn't term his work 'personal growth' but his books are certainly spiritual and contain stories carrying messages.

I've seen the name The Go-Giver pop up many times over the past few years so it was time to take a look. I partly avoided it as I know exactly what it was going to say (the central tenet, not each word ;))… the clue is in the title. Perhaps I was too close to Tom and Joe ;).

It's obvious and it's simple… although not necessarily easy. When we're talking deeply ingrained personality traits, they don't get overridden and replaced after a delightful 2 hour film or 144 page book. But they can be a catalyst or a prompt… or just a bit of harmless entertainment. A lot better than some of the other 'entertainment' out there and far more life affirming.

I'm happy to say I read it as it's a well told story… not too complicated but makes its point.

If you haven't guessed already, the whole concept is based on giving. Many already do this naturally, some not so much. This will actually lead to greater success in the long run, although of course, that should not be the aim of acting in this way as it would backfire.

The Five Laws of Stratospheric Success!

Here are the 5 laws of 'stratospheric success' that the book is based around. I won't delve into them in this section but will cover them and more in the quote section that follows…

1. THE LAW OF VALUE
Your true worth is determined by how much more you give in value than you take in payment.

2. THE LAW OF COMPENSATION
Your income is determined by how many people you serve and how well you serve them.

3. THE LAW OF INFLUENCE
Your influence is determined by how abundantly you place other people’s interests first.

4. THE LAW OF AUTHENTICITY
The most valuable gift you have to offer is yourself.

5. THE LAW OF RECEPTIVITY
The key to effective giving is to stay open to receiving.

Great quotes from the book followed by my go-giving thoughts…

The Go-Giver tells the story of an ambitious young man named Joe who yearns for success. Joe is a true go-getter, though sometimes he feels as if the harder and faster he works, the further away his goals seem to be.

Intro to Joe and his antics. Pretty much what I just said… work smart Joe, smart!

Pindar’s Condition: test every law you read here and see what happens. “Not by thinking about it,” as Pindar tells Joe in chapter 2, “not by talking about it, but by applying it in your life.”

Pindar is the other main player in this saga. Joe's mentor. The 'old-timer', quietly but obviously successful who knows a thing or 2.

Things need to be applied rather than just thought about. And quickly, so you can see for yourself. Gather data, act accordingly.

I was thinking of Pindar as a Richard Branson type character. A billionaire running around having the time of his life, but essentially a hippie.

For such a dedicated go-getter, it seemed like he was doing a lot of going but not a lot of getting.

Poor Joe. Putting in the graft but not really getting anywhere. It's not just about dedication and hard work, although those are important.

"Typically, the more successful they are, the more willing they are to share their secrets with others.”

Talking about successful people. We are often lead to believe that they are all a-holes and will stand over their grandmother to get what they want. Truth is generally the opposite (yeah yeah, we can all name examples either way).

So why are so many 'nice' people often poor and unsuccessful? Well, there's more to the equation. You can be completely open and giving, yet still have boundaries, get done what needs to be done and not have people walk all over you.

Plus there's a pride in sharing as they've done well for themselves, along with knowing there's plenty to go round (ie. you won't run off with 'their' idea and even if you did they'd be just fine - abundance vs scarcity thinking).

storyteller’s voice.

A description of Pindar. This could be what makes him captivating. And fitting in with the theme of the book being a story, the whole concept of stories and storytelling is important.

stratospheric success

I just liked these 2 words. So I highlighted them. 'Stratospheric', sounds spicy!

If you notice, what I said was ‘share her coffee.’ What you said was ‘make a killing.’ Do you see the difference?”

A conversation between Pindar and Joe. Although he didn't mean it badly, Joe's angle was hitting it big with the cash; Pindar was more of the 'sharing your gifts with the world' angle.

There’s nothing wrong with making money. Lots of it, in fact. It’s just not a goal that will make you successful.”

Money is great, this is obvious. We live on an economic planet where money is exchanged for goods and services in order to survive and hopefully thrive. So let's not pretend, these are basic facts. With that said, that goal in and of itself is not the winner.

“Giving.”

Is there some sort of theme developing? ;)

"most people just laugh when they hear that the secret to success is giving.” He paused. “Then again, most people are nowhere near as successful as they wish they were.”

It's hard for some to believe, but then again worth a shot if you're not where you want to be.

‘First give me some heat, then I’ll throw on some logs.’

An example of taking before you've given. You have to put the logs on the fire first in order to receive the heat.

‘Give me interest on my money, then I’ll make a deposit.’

Another example. Try waltzing into a bank and asking for some interest before depositing any funds. That would probably be a robbery.

Trying to be successful with making money as your goal is like trying to travel a superhighway at seventy miles an hour with your eyes glued to the rearview mirror.”

I'm not quite sure of the metaphor on this one. Although the point is, eyes on the road ahead - focus on giving and sharing rather than looking over your shoulder to see what you're receiving.

"You get what you expect.”

"You become what you think about all day long" ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson.

What you focus on is what you get.

"Where focus goes, energy flows" ~ Tony Robbins.

“Ultimately, the world treats you more or less the way you expect to be treated.”

It does. You may not even be aware of it, but it's all fairly precise. Eventually, you get what you believe… and I'm talking the deep belief, not necessarily what you want.

“I need you to agree that you will test every Law I show you by actually trying it out. Not by thinking about it, not by talking about it, but by applying it in your life.”

Pindar's instruction to Joe. Clearly stating the need for application then he can make up his own mind and see for himself.

“It never hurts to be kind to people,”

Probably the best idea for all. It costs nothing and may make someone's day (and make you and everyone in the vicinity feel good to boot). And interestingly, it's probably the rudest people that need the most kindness. That's not to say you have to invite them round for tea and strumpets, but you can be the bigger man or woman. And as Pindar points out in the book, it can have direct advantages (or avoid bad moments).

"appearances can be deceiving.”

Never judge a book by its cover, and all that jazz.

there was a powerful sense of focus and intention.

Focus and intention - 2 words that affect everything.

“Everyone likes to be appreciated,” said Ernesto.

Ernesto is another character in this play. Simple sentence but absolutely correct and the cornerstone of people's desires.

“And that’s the Golden Rule of business,” added Pindar. “All things being equal—” Ernesto finished the phrase: “—people will do business with and refer business to those people they know, like and trust.”

This is obvious but bears repeating. You want to do business with people you know, like and trust and refer people to those of the same.

“A bad restaurant,” Ernesto went on, “tries to give just enough food and service, both in quantity and quality, to justify the money it takes from the customer. A good restaurant strives to give the most quantity and quality for the money it takes. “But a great restaurant—ahh, a great restaurant strives to defy imagination! Its goal is to provide a higher quality of food and service than any amount of money could possibly pay for.”

Being the best. Something different. Above and beyond. Going the extra mile, and not because it's a customer service buzzphrase.

“ ‘Does it make money?’ is not a bad question. It’s a great question. It’s just a bad first question. It starts you off pointed in the wrong direction.”

If we're talking business then it needs to make money, so that is super important. That's what a business is after all… otherwise you're running an NGO or partaking in a hobby. Nothing wrong with that but a business exists to make money or it will simply fold in due course.

The point here is, having it as the first question and sole purpose paradoxically sets you up for failure, or at least a tough ride. Find where you're passionate, where you can do good… and then work out the money aspect and how it all fits together.

“The first question should be, ‘Does it serve? Does it add value to others?’ If the answer to that question is yes, then you can go ahead and ask, ‘Does it make money?’

"Don’t look to become a person of success, look instead to become a person of value" ~ Albert Einstein.

You give, give, give. Why? Because you love to. It’s not a strategy, it’s a way of life.

This is important. It's very easy to look at something like this and think of it like a strategy or tactic. Rubbing your hands together like Mr Burns and upping your giving game, in order to get a good return. This would be wrong. We need to develop this as a habit of who we actually are… then what comes back is what comes back. No expectations, attachments or sense of being 'owed'.

She felt constrained by a system that was geared to teaching children only how to memorize and recite. Over time, she devised a series of games that engaged the kids’ creativity and intellectual curiosity.

Ah yes, the good ol' education system. Needs work shall we say. I think it might be going in the right direction but the old school (pun intended) way of giving facts and figures to kids, in order to be regurgitated back is not the way to go. Vocational, experiential, flexible, creative and useful education is where it's at.

This character did engage the kids' creativity and intellectual curiosity. Good on her! And this was a CEO that Joe was introduced to as part of his own 'training' from Pindar. This lady was very successful at what she had created. And was of course a giver.

"it’s not just a question of their value. It’s a question of impact.”

This is a great discussion. There are many people out there giving plenty of value (and yes, giving) but getting f-all in return. Plenty of nurses, teachers and grafters doing great work but not getting compensated the way some others are. Why the disparage?

There's another side to the equation: impact. You need to serve more people and/or have a greater impact to earn a larger salary and more recognition. That's not to diminish these great people doing sterling work, but the truth is, the market decides. And to get more from the market, you must have more impact.

This ties in with the second law - the law of compensation.

If you want more success, find a way to serve more people. It’s that simple.”

More people and in a bigger way.

“No, quite the opposite. I was afraid it would get out of hand and become really successful. “I was brought up with a belief that there are two types of people in the world. There are people who get rich, and there are people who do good. My belief system said you’re one or the other, you can’t be both.

These things are not mutually exclusive. You can do a lot of good and earn a shit-ton of money. That would be my preference. And the truth is that most rich people contribute the most value. I'm not talking about lottery winners or trust fund babies, but self-made. They have done a lot to get where they are, and they give plenty back too.

Of course, there are plenty of great people doing great things without reward. But remember, there is no nobility in being poor, it's not cool to be a martyr and it most certainly isn't more 'spiritual'.

Interestingly, this character was initially more afraid of success than of failure. Although it sounds strange, this is almost as prominent a problem. Partly due to conditioning as in this case, but also because it will change your life. It may be for the better, but it will shake things up and at its core the brain wants to keep you alive more than anything. So any change is a threat so it will do all it can to maintain the status quo thus keeping you from 'danger'.

“You just decided?” asked Joe. “Yup. Decided.”

It all starts with a decision. A regular feature of these here Book Babbles! Oh, and I'm still terrible at them - just goes to show you can have the knowledge but application is a whole other matter. The point is to decide on whatever 'it' is and go for it. New decisions can be made later if necessary.

And this can happen in an instant. Flick a switch in your brain and you're flying!

Being broke and being rich are both decisions.

Everything's a decision in some way.

“Sometimes you feel foolish, even look foolish, but you do the thing anyway.”

Yeah, sometimes you may look like a berk but you do it anyway because it's the right thing to do.

Some of these tasks she enjoyed more than others. However, she approached each one as though she loved it. She did this by reminding herself that, regardless of how much or how little she cared for the task itself, she relished the opportunity to survive, save and serve.

Serving being the motive rather than the particular task at hand.

"Survive—to meet your basic living needs. Save—to go beyond your basic needs and expand your life. And serve—to make a contribution to the world around you.”

Three universal reasons for working.

“most people spend their entire lives focusing on the first. A smaller number focus on the second. But those rare few who are truly successful—not just financially, but genuinely successful in all aspects of their lives—keep their focus squarely on the third.”

Continuing from above. Obviously you need to survive first and foremost, next up, save a little. The biggest strides will happen on the serving.

"develop a network.”

More than your regular 'networking'. Not going to fake and awkward events exchanging business cards. A real network with people that have your back and are recommending you and your services (as you with them).

I mean a network of people who know you, like you and trust you.

Expansion on the last point.

“When you’ve got your own army of personal walking ambassadors, you’ll have referrals coming your way faster than you can handle them.”

Your network at work!

“Stop keeping score.”

This could be a key right here. I think we all do this to a degree but some more than others. It's not an actual scoring system where you break out an Excel sheet and record every little action or lack of it. But more sub-consciously or held in mind what you've done for them vs what they've done for you. This needs to stop.

Of course, if you are contributing way more to someone in a particular situation and it is clear that this is the case, you need to take a step back and assess whether you want someone like that in your life. It's all very well giving, but if you're doing all the giving and they're making no effort then there is something amiss and you may need to walk. I'm thinking more in the personal relationship realm but it apples to business (which is the same thing ultimately).

The above paragraph is an aside to keep in mind. I think it becomes obvious over the course of time. But to start with you shouldn't hold back, and give without expectations (not even secret ones ;)). If everyone's doing this then we've hit the jackpot!

“When you base your relationships—in business or anywhere else in your life—on who owes who what, that’s not being a friend. That’s being a creditor.”

No-one owes you anything and you don't owe them either. Do as much as you can without expectation but also be aware of how you're being treated in return and adjust accordingly.

Forget win-win—focus on the other person’s win.

Win-win is a classic 'everybody's happy' scenario. What they're saying here is to forget even that and make it the other person's 'win'. This will always lead to a 'win' of your own down the line but for now make it all about the other person. That's not to say, make yourself 'lose' but making them a priority. Law 3 at work.

enlightened self-interest.

Pindar's chit-chat on placing the other person's interests first. The point being your interests will also be taken care of. That can be called enlightened self-interest.

"Givers attract.”

Talking about 'magnetic' people. People that give a lot tend to attract people. I'm not talking about people being taken advantage of… that's something else ;). This is about those people that other people love being around - not just because they might be 'given' something but they feel good around them.

A genuinely sound business principle will apply anywhere in life

Business = relationships = life. All part of the same thing and the same central aspects weave it all together.

"Not whether it simply improves your financial balance sheet, but whether it improves your life’s balance sheet.”

Your life 'balance sheet' is most important. Financial certainly makes up a portion of that but there's far more to it… make sure it all adds up!

There was something else I’d learned over those years, and that was how to be a friend. How to care. How to make people feel good about themselves. And that, my friends, is something the marketplace wants very much—always has, always will.

Genuinely caring.

I had nothing to add but myself.

This character thought she didn't have anything to offer. But she did. Herself!

Connector

A character that Joe was itching to meet and brought a lot of the others together. There are people like this who help tie it all together. Maybe you are one. Or it's a good idea to associate with those who are.

no matter what your training, no matter what your skills, no matter what area you’re in, you are your most important commodity. The most valuable gift you have to offer is you.

It's a cheeseball statement sure, but the only differentiating factor you have over anyone else (or other business) is yourself. You will do things in a way that no-one else does. And that is what's valuable.

“Reaching any goal you set takes ten percent specific knowledge or technical skills—ten percent, max. The other ninety-plus percent is people skills."

People skills are the most important. The rest can be taught. Any business owner worth their salt will hire people first on their personality rather than their technical know-how. Ok, I guess there are circumstances when that needs to be adjusted but mostly speaking, people want to work with people. As do customers.

The most valuable thing you have to give people is yourself.

There it is again.

Authenticity.

One of these words that gets bounded around so it's lost all meaning. What I don't like is people saying they're authentic which for me is completely inauthentic and negates the authenticity! But anyway…

Knowing who you are, and being who you are. That is what authenticity is. And of course ties in with Law 4.

“At this instant, all over the globe, all of humanity is breathing in oxygen and breathing out carbon dioxide. So is the rest of the animal kingdom. And right now, at this instant, all over the globe, the billions and billions of organisms of the plant kingdom are doing the exact opposite—they’re breathing in carbon dioxide and breathing out oxygen. Their giving is our receiving, and our giving is their receiving. “In fact, every giving can happen only because it is also a receiving.”

The balance of giving/receiving and the circle of life. Everything is connected and working in unison.

Because human beings are born with appetite, nothing is more naturally geared toward being receptive than a baby, and if the secret of staying young, vibrant and vital throughout life is to hang on to those most precious characteristics we all have as children but which get drummed out of us—like having big dreams, being curious and believing in yourself—then one of those characteristics is being open to receiving, being hungry to receive, being ravenous to receive!”

Law 5: Receptivity. Opening yourself up to receive. People might think that they are more than ready and willing to receive all the money and other desires they have… but they're not really.

"The Friday Guest?”

You'll have to read the book to find out who the Friday guest is!

“The point is not what you do. Not what you accomplish. It’s who you are.”

Some deep shizzle right there ;). You aren't what you 'do' or your accomplishments. It's being who you are and allowing the cards to fall as they may.

We love go-getters; they take action and get things done!

The authors pointing out there's nothing against the go-getters. We love them! And maybe we even are them at times. The whole book is saying that there's another side to the coin.

Being a go-giver actually makes you a more effective go-getter.

Go-giving can actually help you with the go-getting. For the win!

go-taker.

So a go-getter is not the opposite to a go-giver. In fact, the most genuine go-givers are generally a powerful go-getter. The opposite would be the go-taker. Boo!

success is the result of specific habits of action: creating value, touching people’s lives, putting others’ interests first, being real, and having the humility to stay open to receiving.

In a nutshell.

“Money is an echo of value. It is the thunder to value’s lightning.” The value comes first; the money you receive is the natural result.

Money is a result. An exchange of value and energy, that's it.

Money is not a measure of your goodness or worthiness; it is a measure of your impact.

Back to impact and Law 2. It's not about whether you're 'good' or 'worthy'… you may well be those things but it requires impact to, well, make an impact.

“When you pray, move your feet.”

A Quakers saying. I think we can all figure this one out, religious or not.

Thanks Bob & John! Anything else?

I don't know much about the authors, so do a little digging if they interest you. I have seen that there are a number of spin-off books (The Go-Giver Leader etc.), so you can delve deeper into a particular area that interests you. For me, this book covers it and can be applied to all areas of life.

There are also schools and educational facilities where they are involving the book in the curriculum and has formed somewhat of a movement around the world.

I would highly recommend reading the book… there's something for all regardless of where you're at and what you believe. It's not too heavy going and has the same heart-warming fuzz that Mr Cruise and his cronies bring to the table.

Have you read the book? And any others you recommend?

Check out the others in the series…